im not ashamed of the gospel of jesus christ

‭Romans 1:14, 16-18 NLT‬
[14] For I have a great sense of obligation to people in both the civilized world and the rest of the world, to the educated and uneducated alike.
[16] For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes—the Jew first and also the Gentile. [17] This Good News tells us how God makes us right in his sight. This is accomplished from start to finish by faith. As the Scriptures say, “It is through faith that a righteous person has life.” [18] But God shows his anger from heaven against all sinful, wicked people who suppress the truth by their wickedness.
https://bible.com/bible/116/rom.1.14-18.NLT

This is why I'm so adamant about my videos. It's not MY YouTube channel, it's God's YouTube channel! It's all about promoting the gospel. The stronger we do that, the more people will flee I think. It's interesting how some people will flock to some leaders and think that everything they say is gospel, but if they know someone personally, whether in real life or online, they have no support. But it's ok, because just like Phil Wickam says in his devotional in the Youversion Bible app, we're not doing this for our own glory, we're doing this for God.

You can read it here: Phil Wickam's I Believe Devotional


 I'll keep walking until people want to join. If no one wants to join, I'll walk alone, as a matter of fact, I'm not alone, because Phil and Jesus are walking along with me. They are cheering me on as I run this race, growing stronger. I'm doing my home exercises. I'm reading the Bible. I'm studying. I'm learning about Jesus. I'm learning how to be a strong Christian. If people are going to get bent out of shape because I chose the name Tamara Chaos, then that's fine. If I ever want to change it, I will have to change my url and it's difficult to do that. I could try a redirect tho. I'll ask Phil about it, but in all seriousness, I'm not sure I want to do it, because, there is no guarantee that somehow people are going to be more interested in what I have to say because I changed my url. That seems a bit shallow to me. We shall see what the future holds. Maybe I'll change the url to Heart of Tamara. 
I mean let's think about it, I started a new series called A Passion for Jesus and two people that I subscribe to on YouTube, have given me the impression of ghosting me . This new series however, has inspired a stranger to join me. Other YouTuber's I haven't heard from in a long time have reached out, ever since I changed my channel name to Heart of Tamara. It wasn't right away, but eventually. One of them said they are subscribed to 15,000 channels, so, she takes a long time to watch the channels. The other one was getting caught up on comments he fell behind on. So it makes you wonder, what's in a name? Is it the name, or is this just not inspiring to them? There aren't many people who read anymore. A lot of people involved in online ministry only care about their own ministry. We're supposed to be cheering each other on and being supportive, but that's just not the case. It must be the same for pastors too. It would be cool to start a support group for those involved in online ministry. They could take turns presenting their ministry in front of everyone. I think this is just how it's going to be tho. I'm evidently not a very charismatic person. That's ok, because I'm doing things that interest me. I can actually play songs on the piano and so I've been sharing that. It's displaying my personal music journey. If people want to listen, that's great, if not, no worry. I'm having fun making ai images for the background -something I figured out by myself. I AM capable of doing things with technology MYSELF without relying on Phil. The green screen was a struggle, but now I've been able to use it and make it look like I'm wherever I'm putting myself. There is someone at church who wasn't too supportive of the first episode of A Passion for Jesus because I use my green screen. I guess people almost 80 can't handle that, but mom loved it. I'm excited for episode two and I've been ordering props for it. It's going to take place in Mexico. Zayna has taken the journal to mexico and two agents are protecting her, even tho one of the agents-Agent Lana wants to steal the journal back. But Agent Lee says no. The video is using a lot of creative aspects and it won't appeal to many, but that's ok. As always, I will be extracting the message from it and putting that separately as a podcast. I'm very excited about both messages from episode 1 and 2. 

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